Surrender of the Weak Is No Prize

Years ago when I embarked on the wondrous journey into the lifestyle of M/s, D/s, and BDSM relationships I was asked what I was seeking. That proved to be a milestone along my way. After considering it for a time, my answer was, and still is, that I sought a slave who could and would give to me everything that she was, is and would become; totally, completely, and without reservation.

This is a pretty tall order. To totally surrender all that you are and have, to surrender your entire life to another requires far more strength of character than I can muster. I have found that while it takes more guts to surrender, it does require more work to Master, if the relationship is to grow and blossom and satisfy the wants, needs, dreams, and desires of all involved. I relish being the caretaker of those wants, needs, dreams, and desires and the artist who crafts the life that will make it all come true. At the same time, I stand in reverent awe of those who give themselves over (or are in the process of doing so, if you will) to the Master’s will. (Thank you, ally, for allowing me to have this every day in my life!)

It makes me laugh when I hear the misguided and ill-informed opine that “The only reason a person is a slave (or submissive) is due to a lack of self-image,” and other such falsehoods. We ALL have self-image issues of one kind or another. This is the nature of the human animal.

I like to give this analogy to describe what I believe is the ideal of the M/s relationship. The slave is a thoroughbred race horse.   She is power and grace and beauty, but just cantering in a meadow on her own never brings her to her fullest potential. Now comes the Master; the jockey. He brings training, focus, and direction to the slave’s raw power and together they accomplish what neither could on their own. After training, and care and race after race, they become a single unit; poetry in motion. The result of the combination of the Master and slave is more than what is brought to the relationship by each. This is the beautiful synergy and profundity of the Master/slave relationship.

Everyone has played a game of some kind with a child or someone who was learning and was easily bested at the game. Well, unless you are a first class turkey, this kind of thing brings no real satisfaction. Now play the same game against a worthy, knowledgeable, and capable opponent. Vanquish him and how do you feel? What kind of true sense of accomplishment can be had by owning a slave who presents no challenge? If there is nothing being taught, if there is nothing being learned, if there are no conflicts to be resolved, and if there is no struggle to improve the relationship, there is no growth on the part of the slave or the Master, then one of you is not necessary.  Give me a challenging, intelligent, thinking, opinionated slave every time. (Thank you again, ally!!) The satisfaction of bending and molding to my will a thing of beauty that I own, while not breaking its spirit, is one of the ultimate pleasures of the life I have chosen.

What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, the wise man said. So it is true with the Master and slave. The stronger the slave, the stronger will be the Master, and the relationship will soar to the zenith of what is possible.

Yes, my friends, surrender of the weak is no prize.

Cavalier © 2003