The Concept of a 24/7 Master/Slave Relationship

 

Throughout the years that I have been a slave in my Master’s home, I have often been asked, “You can’t really do that 24/7, can you?”

This statement in the form of a question is often followed by examples of why it cannot be done, i.e. “Well you have to make decisions sometimes, don’t you?” or “What about in front of your kids? You can’t be a slave then, right?” Or my favorite, “What if you get sick and he has to take care of you? Who is the slave then?” And then there is the ever-popular, “What about in public at a restaurant or grocery store?”

I think these are good questions and examples, however, I believe they are colored by what first comes to mind in many people when they hear the term “24/7 absolute, M/s relationship.” A woman, chained and naked, unable to make even the simplest decision on her own and who relies on the micromanagement of her owner at every moment of the day is one image. There are several other variations thereof.

What I believe many people don’t understand is that for some of us, our roles as slaves do not rely specifically on physical trappings or micromanagement. Over time, we have learned our owners’ likes and dislikes. We understand the manner in which he wants his home run. We know that he puts the needs of the children above his own so when we have to tend to the kids or make one of many decisions we do throughout the day, we are doing so as slaves. Changing a diaper or grounding a teenager does not counter our slavery. We don’t have to switch it on and off because it has become who we are. Our owner’s desires have become paramount and every decision we are faced with is made with that knowledge and emotion deep within us. It is embedded in all that we do and on the outside, to someone who is “not in the know,” it might not be noticed at all but that does not negate its existence.

In my case, I believe the “who” part of me is defined by my owner and my own reaction to him. He, by nature, is a dominant, strong, and confident individual. On the other hand, I am not a submissive, dependent woman in general but my reaction, response, and natural role in relationship to him specifically is indeed submissive and dependent. (I also react in a similar, submissive manner to other dominant, strong, confident people - primarily men.) He has, by way of his tutelage, guidance, and control, brought out each petal of my surrender – an enslavement that continuously blossoms and grows each day. It is because of the natural evolution of our relationship that I can indeed live this on a 24/7 basis. Through our time together we’ve developed a symbiosis that allows us to be who we are at our very primal core at every moment.

When beginning any relationship, it is extraordinarily important to make sure that the fit is right in the most important areas, regardless of the type of relationship. In an intimate, life-long relationship, it becomes even more important.

For example, having the “M/s” in common won’t do it alone. I have seen many relationships fail because they base the entirety of their interaction on only M/s. They don’t look further into the individual to discover the other facets that exist within that potential life-mate. Political, spiritual and child-rearing beliefs as well as financial issues, family values, and employment goals are some examples of areas that merit intense communication before jumping in with both feet.

With common principles, interests, goals, and individual life philosophies that mesh with each other, the transition to a 24/7 relationship will run much smoother and become more attainable. If my owner and I have the same general principles, then my making a decision won’t be so terribly wrong in the confines of M/s because I am doing so based on his principles as well. If that time comes when it may clash, I have committed myself to a relationship that dictates that HE will have the final authority. I didn’t sign on for anything less. Within the confines of that relationship – within the circle of the collar he placed upon me, I have no other choice but to obey. If I choose otherwise, it will fall outside of those boundaries and at that point it would be up to him to redefine the relationship as my disobedience or “stepping off the path” would change the dynamics of what we had.

I believe that the more “grey” area falls within lifestyle behavior, the outward expression of your mastery/slavery, and what demands are placed on each individual within the relationship. For example, some slaves simply would not be able to kneel (crawl, etc.) if commanded, at the local pub. In this case, their M/s dynamics might not extend to public life around non-lifestyle folk. On the other hand, others (like me) would indeed kneel because in our own mind/spirit/psyche, we know beyond any doubt, that our owner would not demand us to do such a thing without knowing that our better interests are being served, or at the least not harmed. In my case, he would also be conscious of those around us so that he wasn’t infringing on their own right to enjoy the time they spend at said local hangout. He has my implicit trust and that is (I believe) the key for a successful 24/7 M/s relationship, regardless of where we are or what he commands.

The road is often extremely difficult and we struggle like most people would, putting conscious effort into what we are building together. For me, the struggle can seem almost insurmountable at times – this acquiescence even when I don’t agree or don’t “want to” can be very daunting. Sometimes I must fight my own self-consciousness, fears, and embarrassment even, but in those moments when I do give that to him, I provide both to him and myself a greater sense of accomplishment and I realize that once again, I have not failed.

With that understanding and with a constant source of communication and growth, I believe that a 24/7 M/s relationship is not only possible, but probable and for me, it has become a fulfilling and necessary way in which to live. I still retain the ability to be independent and to take care of myself, but beneath his hand, I can joyfully serve him, obey him, and implicitly trust and depend on him to do what it best for me in all ways, always.



.